Learning to Be a Mother of Two

For me, the recovery from having a second child has been far different from my first . . . emotionally and physically.

Physically - wayyyyyy easier. I am in no pain and I feel relatively great!

Emotionally - Welllllll, before Rebekah came I was worried about how Alex would react. I thought he would have a hard time. Wrong! I am the one who is having hard time giving up my time with him. I am totally stuck on this kid and I have had some serious emotional flip outs over this. :O) I miss my mommy/son time sooooo much, and I have been feeling guilty for not being able to take him outside, to friends houses, to wrestle with him, hold him, etc. whenever I want to. This, in addition to feeling sad that little Rebekah will never get the time and attention that Alex got for the last 2 years. I know I know . . . too much guilt . . . .

Alex, however, with the exception of a few moments here and there, has taken this change with admirable ease. I wonder at this kid. He is so sweet to her and loves her to pieces. He wants to hold her all the time. He likes to share his toys with her and show her his tricks. He is always kissing her and saying things like, "I love her," or "Cute Baby Rebekah Jane," or "I love Rebekah Jane," or "Its okay baby Rebekah."

Soooo, I emailed my mission president's wife (the mother of 11 wonderful children) and told her my woes. This was her email back to me:

"Dear Heidi,

Don't worry, he won't get all the quality time you think he needs, that's just the result of having two very young children. But you are giving him more important things than tons of quality time...you are giving him the pattern of obedient and spiritual living and the protection of the priesthood. Plus a sister!! Each prince and princess you add to your eternal family adds more spirit and power and goodness to the group, even if he or she takes some of your time from Alex. It's O.K. and remember, you need some quality time just for yourself, too."

I share this email and this experience for those who may feel this way now, have felt this way in the past, or may feel this way in the future. This inspired counsel completely changed my attitude about my new life as a mother of two. I feel excited now and I am anxious to see how these two angels in my life grow and develop in the gospel. I am so grateful for inspired examples in my life. I hope this helps someone else, because it sure helped me.

Here are some pictures of the kiddies and some of what we have been up to these last two weeks:

This is the day we brought Rebekah home from the hospital. She seemed happy to be home because she pretty much slept soundly the entire day. Something she couldn't do at the hospital with all the poking and prodding. "Don't bother me, I'm sleeping."We are pretty sure that all 8 lbs 11 oz of her is in her cheeks, because the rest of her is long and super skinny like her feet. Look how long they are!! Check out those finger toes! So cute. I love em!

Her duck face. I think she might also be showing off her long (hopefully piano playing) fingers. This is day two home and already so alert. She loves to look around at the world. This is Alex's very favorite part of the day it seems. Kissing and snuggling with his new sister. Holding her again. We do this about 10 times a day. In fact offering him the opportunity to hold her is how I barter with him to do things I want him to do like change his daiper, take a nap, etc.

Another one of Alex's favorites now is playing in the jungle gym with Rebekah. He thinks this is very cool.When they are a little older and fighting with one another, I will show them these pictures and some videos we have to remind them of how much they once loved being around each other. Rebekah always seems content when Alex is near her . . . unless he is smooshing her face or something, then she gets annoyed and has no qualms about stating her dissatisfaction through loud outbursts of yelling.